Bay Shore NY
10-13-2026 2:40pm

I'll Always Love My Mama

SKYLARK'S ARTICLE OF THE WEEK

My family and I celebrated our mother's birthday this past Tuesday. She would have been 96. She passed away in 2010 at the age of 80. It may feel like a lot of years ago, but she is ever present.

People often say, "time goes so fast." But the truth is, time is irrelevant when you love someone. Because we remember a person up to the point of their passing, their memory remains locked in time, kind of like a time capsule. And in that space, their memory lingers as a heightened energy. By that I mean, their memory takes on an eternally positive essence. 

When someone passes away, the idea that their memory is “locked in time” comes from how the brain stores, preserves, and re‑experiences memories tied to deep emotional bonds.

Let's break it down:

1. Emotional “glue” strengthens memory traces

Neuroscience shows that emotionally charged events — like the death of a loved one — create especially strong neural connections. These are called memory engrams, physical traces in the brain that are reinforced by processes like long‑term potentiation (LTP), where synapses between neurons become more active and persistent. Because the event is so emotionally significant, the brain’s “memory glue” keeps these connections from fading, making the memory vivid and long‑lasting.

2. Grief rewires the brain’s time perception

Grief is not just emotional — it’s a neurological process. In the early stages, the brain is flooded with stress hormones, and the amygdala (emotional alarm center) is hyperactive while the prefrontal cortex (planning, rational thought) struggles to keep up. This can cause a collapse of the sense of time, where past and present feel blurred. The brain may “freeze” the moment of loss in its internal maps, preserving the emotional context as if it were still happening.

3. Neural maps of loved ones remain intact

Our brains build mental “maps” of people we love, tracking where they are in our social and emotional world. When someone dies, these maps are disrupted, but the neural structures that held the memory of that person — their voice, their presence, shared experiences — remain encoded. The brain continues to retrieve them because they are tied to survival‑level attachment systems that evolved to keep loved ones in mind.

4. Why it feels “frozen”

Because the memory is stored in a network of brain regions (hippocampus, neocortex) and is reinforced by emotional salience, it resists decay. Each time you recall it, the neural pathways are re‑activated, strengthening the “snapshot” in your mind. This is why the memory can feel timeless — it’s not that the person is literally preserved, but that the brain’s emotional and neural architecture keeps the moment vivid, as if it were still occurring.

Your memory of someone who has passed away is “locked in time” because the brain’s emotional and neural systems treat it as a high‑value, survival‑critical memory. The combination of strong synaptic reinforcement, grief‑induced time distortion, and intact neural maps means the memory remains vivid and emotionally charged for life. What a blessing that is.

Peace and Love,

Skylark

By now, we've all lost loved ones that we think about each and every day. Love never dies. It walks beside us.

SKYLARK'S PICK OF THE WEEK

My pick of the week is the Brightwaters Village Wide Garage Sale this Saturday, October 17. I hope to see you there!

SKYLARK'S HIGHLIGHT OF THE WEEK

The highlight of the week was an early morning bird walk through Belmont State Park with the Great South Bay Audubon Society. This is a great way to spend your time in retirement. We wak each Tuesday morning in the fall and once a month on Saturdays during this glorious season. Visit www.greatsouthbayaudubonsociety.org to become a member today.

<!-- EMBEDDED FACEBOOK URL: https://www.facebook.com/photo?fbid=10168481625882796&set=pcb.101684816… -->

SKYLARK'S INSPIRATIONAL QUOTE OF THE WEEK

SKYLARK'S PRAYER OF THE WEEK

SKYLARK'S ITALIAN PHRASE OF THE WEEK

English: I'll always love my Mama.

Italian: Amerò sempre la mia mamma.

SKYLARK'S INTERIOR DECORATING TIP OF THE WEEK

My dining room table is like an interior garden. It brings me so much pleasure to look at seasonal flowers each day. My dear friend, Linda, brought me hydrangeas recently. They are so beautiful. Don't be afraid to fill your home with flowers. It will feel like you live in a garden. Fiore Bello!  

<!-- EMBEDDED FACEBOOK URL: https://www.facebook.com/reel/2135053793886349 -->

SKYLARK'S QUESTION OF THE WEEK

What are your favorite flowers that you bring into your home?

Please put your answer under the Comment section in my post. I'd love to hear from you.

SKYLARK'S SONG OF THE WEEK - FOR THE ROSES by JONI MITCHELL

<!-- EMBEDDED YOUTU.BE URL: https://youtu.be/g_bqzHb4ESc?list=RDg_bqzHb4ESc -->

Lyrics

I heard it in the wind last night
Sounded like applause
Did you get a round resounding for you way up here
It seems like many dim years ago
Since I heard that face to face, or seen you face to face
Though tonight I can feel you here
I get these notes on butterflies and lilac sprays
From girls who just have to tell me they saw you somewhere
In some office sits a poet, and he trembles as he sings
And he asks some guy to circulate his soul around
On your mark red ribbon runner
The caressing rev of motors finely tuned like fancy women in thirties evening gowns
Up the charts off to the airport
Your name's in the news, everything's first class
The lights go down, and it's just you up there
Getting them to feel like that
Remember the days when you used to sit and make up your tunes for love
And pour your simple sorrow to the sound hole and your knee
And now you're seen on giant screens
And at parties for the press
And for people who have slices of you from the company
They toss around your latest golden egg
Speculation, well who's to know
If the next one in the nest will glitter for them so
I guess I seem ungrateful
With my teeth sunk in the hand that brings me things
I really can't give up just yet
Now I sit up here the critic and they introduce some band
But they seem so much confetti looking at them on my TV set
Oh! The power and the glory
Just when you're getting a taste for worship, they start bringing out the hammers
And the boards, and the nails
I heard it in the wind last night
It sounded like applause
Chilly now
End of summer, no more shiny hot nights
It was just the arbutus rustling
And the bumping of the logs
And the moon swept down black water
Like an empty spotlight



MY BRAND - SKYLARK LIVE

I created my brand, Skylark Live, when I turned 60 years old and noticed a profound shift in this age. I wanted to talk about it and share what I was experiencing with the hope of helping other women as well. My brand consists of a weekly newsletter and a monthly vlog designed to motivate and inspire women over 60 to thrive in mature ageing through knowledge and self-awareness. I am open to conducting in-person conversations called The Skylark Sessions. These can be held in someone’s home or at a local library or senior center. To be continued.

Skylark Live Weekly Newsletter - My weekly newsletter, 60 and Beyond with Skylark - Living Life Inside and Outside the Home, features articles about human interest, nature, general observations, inspiration, goals, motivation, places I've been to, and ideas I want to explore. I'm open to ideas of what to write about, so let me know. I represent Bay Shore and towns beyond. There is also a calendar of events. I throw in Italian words, too, because I love the language and all things Italian. Bella Italia! As a paid subscriber, you will receive my newsletter each week in your email. That gives you a head's up. You can also advertise your business or event on my newsletter. Just click this link to subscribe: For updates, subscribe to our free newsletter! You can also become a paying subscriber.

Skylark Live Monthly Vlog - My first Monday-of-the month vlog is a recap of the articles I've written in my newsletter throughout the previous month. Then, I introduce a unique topic for the current month's vlog. You can find some of my vlogs on my YouTube channel. I also post them on my social media platforms. Just click my YouTube channel link below to subscribe: www.youtube.com/@christineskylark

$UPPORT ME:

Patreon - www.patreon.com/SkylarkLive

Substack - https://substack.com/@christinelarkin1?

Personal Shopper for Interior Decorating Accessories - www.skylarklive.org

FOLLOW ME:

Facebook, X, Instagram, and LinkedIn under my brand, Skylark Live.

Thank you for your love and support! Grazie per il vostro amore e sostegno!

I'm interested
I disagree with this
This is unverified
Spam
Offensive